Nettie: Your Emotional Blog Advisor
Dear Nettie,
After spending a delightful weekend away I came home to a totally disturbing message when I tried to log into my blog. 403. Forbidden. I freaked out! I was locked out of my own blog! In despair I tried to contact tech support with repeated emails. I was plagued with visions
of all my past posts, links and connections destroyed, swirling down the toilet. Everything lost. Gone. And I was angry, helpless, frustrated, desperate.My question for you is this: how do I handle the intense feelings? Why do events like this have such a profoundly disturbing effect on me, and what can I do about my reactions?
(The problem, by the way, was eventually solved, but it took me a long time to recover my emotional equilibrium.) Do you have any advice for riding these waves?
signed,
Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here.
AAYWEH (as in ‘Oy vay’), unfortunately I know exactly how you feel.
Why does the world suddenly turn into a maelstrom of emotional chaos when something like that happens? I’ll tell you why: Because the internet is an incomprehensible black hole. Well, at least for most of us. When we get clubbed over the head by something on the internet, it’s like our fears of the bogeyman materialized, the monsters from under the bed have grabbed us by the ankle, the slimy sea creatures from the deep waters are wrapping their tentacles around us.
(Who’s calling me dramatic? You just wait until it happens to you!)
Honestly. We don’t know much about the internet (like, where exactly does it live??) and many of its mechanisms are quite mysterious. When something goes wrong it’s not like stubbing your real toe against a real rock. We can see what’s happening, we know the cause of the pain, we swear to high heaven, and then it’s over.
But who really knows where frankenstein.org is lurking, what it looks like and when it will attack again?
Enough of the whining. What can you do?
- Knowledge is power. As anyone who’s ever watched Scoobiedoo knows, when you take a flashlight to a monster, it usually evaporates. Almost all the internet related problems we mortals experience (i.e. those of us who don’t have two PhD’s in computer science) have been seen and dealt with before. And what’s that magic flashlight? Forums! If there’s a problem, there’s a forum where people talk about it – and about its solutions.
- Think back to a panicked moment in your life a few years back. The time you left your keys in the ignition and locked the car, leaving it in a bad neighbourhood. Remember how horrible it felt then. Then compare it to how it feels now. Big difference, isn’t it? Arm yourself with the knowledge that this time around, too, you won’t feel awful for a long time. Often just knowing that shrinks that dreadful feeling.
- Feelings of fear, anger and frustration ALWAYS find their way into your physical body. Right away. That’s the main reason why they feel so gross: knots in the stomach, a vise around the chest, knees like you’re suddenly 93. So go deal with the body! The worst thing you can do is eat potato chips and flop in front of the TV. Go out for a vigorous walk, get on your treadmill, turn on the music and dance!
- I also hear that backing things up helps. A rumor? Check it out for yourself.
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And of course there’s always a good glass of single malt.
Nettie
If you have a burning question or concern, send it right over to Nettie using the simple form on our Just Ask Nettie! page, or add it to the comments section below.
have your iguana do the blogging? Okay, not really but you could say it’s your iguana writing;